My Aspirations and Interests

When I was little I wanted to be an author. It seemed the obvious choice since I love reading so much. When I was little I used to be praised for my writing. Now I'm finding that even I'm not able to get into reading my own writing. Whether that's because I've read a lot more now and know what good writing is or my writing has gotten worse doesn't matter. I don't like the stories I'm writing now, so once I've read through them some time later I can't finish them. I tried to edit some of my old stories but they just seem so boring now. I co-wrote a long-ish story with Li Sa, each of us writing a page or so  and alternating. I'm thinking I might tidy that up, grammar and plot wise. Because we didn't know where we were going sometimes, there are abandoned plot lines and bits of foreshadowing that are just forgotten about.


Someone told me that writing should be done on the side of the main career because if it becomes a full time job, it involves a lot of presure and might make it hard to continue. I think that might be true.

So now I think I might want to be a psychologist or behavioural scientist because of my interest in human behaviour. I'm interested by the fact that a lot of people sometimes act the same way. For example people often do and believe things merely because many other people do and believe the same things. Or that eye witnesses may be influence to believe they saw a certain thing by popular opinion even when it's not true.

But the problem with choosing what career you want now is that for many jobs, we don't know exactly what they have to do on the job. We don't know what we would learn, we don't know if we would be good at it. What do psychologists do? Do they counsel people? How do they do that? What other aspects is there to the job? Would I do well in it? Would it be easy to get a job? I don't know, and that uncertainty scares me.

The other thing that interest me is the difference between cultures and countries. In some cultures waht's good for the group is very important, in others the individual's opinions are very important; maybe one culture has strict rules of etiquette, but another's is loose; one culture is concerned with rules and routine, another with creativity. I like to know the different thought process of different cultures, I like to know how the differences influence the way those people act, and how they are reflected in the society.

I'm not notably bad at any subject, and that makes it hard when I try to narrow down my options. I'm good at Science and I'm good at Maths, but I don't know if I really like them. I don't know if I can stand being immersed in numbers all day long in my job. I prefer the humanities than the sciences, but I think it's easier to get jobs with the sciences, a very Asian concern.

I'm taking economics, physics and chemistry next year, and I think I might not like either physics or chemistry. Regardless, adults say they're good subjects to do, especially physics, since that help in a lot of areas, so that's what I chose. Mum and Grandma don't force me into anything ever, but mostly I take their advice. Our parents and teachers have lived so many more years and has experienced so much more that in most things, they do know better than us.

The conclusion is that I'll wait and see. 船到桥头自然直, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. Who knows, maybe something will happen to change things.